Who’s a good boy? John is. He writes every day. Politics. He’s writes about it.

What is politics? I don’t know! But John writes. Every day, he writes. About politics. He writes good. About politics. He writes about politics. John is a good boy.

John says I’m cute. I don’t know. But I believe John! You should, too. He works so hard. Very serious work. Then fun! John and I walk and we sniff and we play. Fun is good!

John says Trump is bad. I don’t know what Trump is. But I don’t like bad. Bad is bad. Bad isn’t good. I like good. I know you do, too. Good people, they like good, too.

Every day, John writes. He looks at the square thing that glows. A computer? I don’t know, but he looks serious. Very serious. Very good! John writes. John’s good!

I need John. John needs me. John needs you. He says subscribe. Subscribe is good! I don’t what what subscribe is. John needs it. It must be good! He’s a good boy.

I need John. John needs me. John needs you!

—Hades